Why I’m Taking a Child’s Approach to Dating

Why I'm Taking a Child's Approach to Dating
Why I'm Taking a Child's Approach to Dating

My niece Nila looks at the world with innocence and wonder. Children are open, free, and untainted. They don't see color. They don't judge based on height, tone of voice, or looks. Children simply need attention, love, and protection. In reality, that's what we all want in love and life.


So I've decided to take a child's approach to dating. Instead of seeing the negative first (he's balding!), I will see the positive (he has nice eyes). Here are three other ways that I will date like a kid:

1. Focus on how he treats me
When a child has a friend that hugs them and listens to their toddler woes (in baby talk, of course) that friend is their best friend. My niece Nila has about 10 BBFs but only because so many shower her with love and affection. As soon as one of us "crosses her," however, Nila crosses us off of her imaginary BFF list. Same goes for me when dating. I have a checklist of all the great things and take note of the not so great. If a man isn't treating me with love and affection, they are off my potential BF list.

Related: 3 things you should let a man do when he's courting you

2. Look at long-term potential
A man's smile, kissable lips, and charisma: these are all aphrodisiacs. But if he doesn't have any other great qualities, he may not be marriage-material. I've learned to look at a man beyond the physical. There should be more than meets the eye. So, just like a child loves on a deeper level, so will I. It's not only about the outside.

3. Forgive the small slip-ups
When Nila gets mad at me, she gets over it fairly quickly. That's because kids are resilient. They aren't jaded. They see your mistakes as your own, not as the mistakes of those who hurt them in the past. This is how I want to date. I want to forgive small slip-ups. I want to deal with the person and not hold a grudge or be upset because of the hurt from my past relationships.

Ultimately, I want to live in the present moment. I will see and take note of what matters when dating so I can have the love and affection we all crave in life.

Photo source: Flickr.com/p4nc0np4n.

-By Sujeiry Gonzalez

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