Would you let your partner get a "happy ending" or is a h*ndjob actually your job?
There's a blog post on MomLogic.com this week about sanctioned extramarital h*ndjobs, titled "I Told My Husband to Get a 'Happy Ending.'" The subtitle tells you all you need to know: "I don't consider it cheating--and when he finally got his 'massage,' I was happy for him!" Big whoop, right? It was her idea, he enjoyed it, and it made her happy that he enjoyed it. Yay for making up your own rules when it comes to long-term monogamy! She's not exactly the first woman to give her man this kind of permission slip, and she's certainly not the first to write about it either--even two relative prudes like us wrote about considering the same thing back in 2005. (Our guys never took us up on the offer, so we never got to find out if we could be as open-minded in practice as in theory.)
Maybe you don't consider a "happy ending" cheating, but what about watching porn?
No, the real shocker is in the feedback section at the bottom of the page. The readers are PISSED OFF! Now, maybe this is what you get for blogging about h*ndjobs on a site that is more likely to feature stories about Halloween costumes for kids or whether Bachelorette Trista's second pregnancy is high-risk. But still. After the jump, a random sampling of the vitriol:
I just think it is nasty. If your husband wants a happy ending, then where are you? I think the happy endings should be provided by YOU.... THE WIFE while you are massaging your own husband.
Are you too busy to do this??? Maybe you should try and put some time on the side because this is nasty, and to proud of it, is even nastier.
That's called prostitution. You're proud that you encouraged your husband to be with a prostitute? And you teased him because he was too loyal to go through with it for such a long time!? That's sad. That's really, really sad, lady.
There may be something wrong with your relationship if you guys are hi 5ing over another woman doing your job. Maybe this has been giving you a reason to justify your own behaviors or secret wants? Why be married?
This is part of the huge problem we have right now with marriage. People seem to think that we don't have to be loyal anymore and that is why the divorce rate is so high. I would NEVER be okay with my hubby doing such a thing. And to tell the truth, he really could not do it. I love that he has good morals :)
Sure, a handful of readers defended the blogger's right to define marriage on her own terms, but the overwhelming majority let out a resounding "ewwwwww." (At least one commenter actually used the "ew" word.) Um, did they miss the part where she said "I've never trusted my husband more." Did they miss the part where it was her idea? Did they miss the part where she and her husband mutually agreed that this would be a good thing? Did they miss the part where he called her up to tell her about it? Did they miss the part where this couple has an amazing relationship and can say anything to each other and are working really hard to keep each other happy? (You won't believe how one man went maintaining a happy marriage. Could it work for you?)
It sounds like a happy, loving, honest, faithful marriage to us. And it sounds a million times better than the kind of relationship where it's your "job" to keep the h*ndjobs coming and "good morals" come with a smiley-face emoticon.
Even better, how about the kind of marriage where you both get a sanctioned happy ending...?
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