10 ways to find time in your day for what really matters
I've been in a hurried, harried flurry of stress these past few days, rushing from meetings to appointments to evening work events. I've already drafted one email to a friend apologizing for being abnormally MIA, and don't even ask what happened to the gym. As a fierce protector of my days--which have to include stuff like eating dinner with my husband while watching The West Wing reruns and attending my favorite step class--I do not like this state of things one bit. If you, too, feel like your life has turned into a whirling dervish of obligations with no time leftover for the important stuff, you've come to the right place.
1. Identify your non-negotiables
What's been getting short-shrift that is absolutely essential to you for a meaningful life? It could be pushing aside the furniture for living room yoga once a week, talking to your best friend on the phone, or time alone with your sweetie, but be specific about what in your life are absolute, no-excuses top priority. Aim for 5 happy life essentials.
2. Find your time-sucks
I can get sucked into the Internet, and 15, 47, or 99 minutes later not know what happened (or, for that matter, what I've been doing). The harsh reality of feeling like you don't have enough time is realizing that it's going somewhere. Facebook, needless telephone chats, meetings without agendas, super bad television--the usual suspects are sucking up your time. Cut back or nix these all together so that you can't put something more meaningful in its place.
3. Scrutinize your day
If it's not immediately noticeable to you what's eating up your time, spend a few evenings before sleep going over your day with a fine-toothed comb. Make a postmortem schedule: from 6:30-7 you woke up and let out the dog, from 7-7:30 you made and cleaned up breakfast, and so on. There will be blocks of time when you are engaging in non-essential time sucks (see #2). Once you've identified them, minimize or cut them out all together so you can replace them with something more worthy.
4. See what's missing
Okay, so you've looked your daily life in the face, and you might realize that you're far from your ideal way of living. Sometimes what's missing from our lives isn't something that's suddenly been squeezed out from lack of time, but stuff we've never made room for in the first place. Maybe you want to find more time for your crafts or you'd like to be making dinner more often instead of cooking a frozen pizza. It could be time to organize that neighborhood book club or start meditating in the morning. If there are things that you envision as part of your ideal life that are sorely absent in your days, identify what those things are, too. (Read more about making the most of your daily life.)
5. Say no
Start protecting your time like a dragon guarding his cave. When you get invitations to things that sound kinda interesting, just say no. You let go of the time spent on the event itself, but also the energy you would have wasted dragging your feet and feeling resentful.
6. Stop multitasking
This was a revelation to me: multitasking isn't really doing multiple things at once; it's going back and forth between several tasks at the same time. Durh. Studies show that we slow down and make more mistakes when we're trying to accomplish three things at once. Take it one thing at a time, and you'll cross off your to do list that much faster, leaving more time for bedtime stories and family snuggling.
7. Cut back on email
Stop checking your email during dinner and 47 times a day. Clear out your email in batches--for the last 10 minutes of every hour if you need to be super on top of it for work, or twice a day if email isn't as much of a lifeline. Keep your responses short.
8. Schedule in what you love
One of the reasons what really matters to us--bubble baths, Zumba--gets pushed aside is because we don't actually put it in our schedules. Instead, we just have a vague feeling that we're missing out. Haul out your calender and look at tomorrow, this weekend, and next week. Put down in black and white those things in your life that are essentials (#1, #4). And just as you would a doctor's appointment or work meeting, honor those obligations. (Read more about living a life filled with passion.)
9. Get up early, or stay up late
I'm not one to give up sleep for anything (in fact, I might name it as one of non-negotiables), but you might find that waking up even thirty minutes earlier gives you the time you need to do a few down-dogs or write in your journal before the rest of the house wakes up. If you're a night owl, stay up to tend to yourself for a bit after you put the troops to bed.
10. Don't feel guilty
A lot of people have trouble saying no to social events or scheduling time for themselves. It seems so selfish, they worry. But look: you can't keep being an awesome mom or super employee if you can't tend to your own needs. When the gas tank is empty, the car won't go. Remember that filling yours up is as much a priority as paying the bills or doing the laundry, and in the long run, a heck of a lot more important.
So let's hear it: what are your non-negotiables? What are you going to be making time for?
More from Real-Life Makeover>>
Photo: Thinkstock
