10 Super-Selfish Reasons for Wanting to Induce Labor

This is me, walking through the mall last night trying to bring on labor. No such luck. Last week I posted 10 reasons I'm not ready for my pregnancy to end. Be careful what you wish for! I'm now four days past my due date with no signs of labor starting any time soon. I could get induced but that's not my style and the baby is still very happy and healthy where she is. I know a lot people would have opted to be induced the second their doctor offered. Trust me, I get it. But I don't really believe in inducing labor for non-medical reasons. For me. I want to have a drug-free/intervention-free delivery and if I'm induced, those things will be less likely. And I don't want to spend a whole lot of time in the hospital, which is where I'd need to stay under those circumstances.

Mostly it's because I want the baby to come when she's ready — and when my body is ready — so that labor/delivery/recovery are as smooth as can be. I'm not going to evict her unless I have to. That said, I'm getting kind of tired of waiting. For the longest time I didn't feel like I was ready for her — I had work deadlines and kid school stuff and shopping/cleaning/laundry to do — but all of that is done now. It's like "Groundhog's Day" around here (the Bill Murray movie, not the silly holiday). Wake up, tell people I'm not in labor, walk around, nest, eat, repeat. Sure I could do other things but it's so hard to focus on anything else right now. I've been trying natural ways to induce labor because this is just…strange. And a little frustrating. My life has been on pause for the past week and I'm more of a fast-forward kinda gal. I went into labor with my first two on their due dates and had them the next morning, so I wasn't really expecting this. Obviously I want to meet the baby, snuggle her and make sure she's OK — and I'm so excited for all of that — but I've gotten to the point where my motivations for wanting this kid out are pretty ridiculous. And selfish. I'm honestly thinking about this stuff and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Here, my (completely non-medical, kinda un-p.c.) reasons for wanting labor to start NOW:

1. I'm hosting my annual Christmas party in one month (ack!) and I really need to start getting in shape for it.

2. My beloved book club (wine club) is meeting on the 21st and if I'd had a 10-day-old as I thought I would, I was going to attempt a quick cameo. Now there's just no way. Unless I have the baby today?

3. Pottery Barn is having a sale on monogrammed Christmas stockings but it ends tomorrow. And if I don't have a baby by then, I won't have the baby's name for the stocking. D'oh!

4. We're having extended family photos taken (it was my mom's Christmas present last year) on the 23rd and I'd like it if my postpartum belly was gone by then. Fat chance at this point (pun intended).

5. I want to start the clock on this kid getting older and bigger so she'll be sleeping through the night sooner. I was kind of hoping for a Christmas miracle.

6. I'm happy with my pregnancy weight gain (30 pounds), but every day the baby stays in is another opportunity for me to pack on the lbs. since I'm treating every meal like it could be my last (I've had five "last hurrah before baby!" restaurant meals this week alone). And because I'm bored.

7. My house is currently spotless and super organized, but with two other kids tearing through it working against me, I don't know how long I can keep my nest neat.

8. I got a mani/pedi last week thinking the baby was coming any day. Now I'm almost to the point of needing another and I don't want to waste the money. But once she comes, it's going to be a while before I hit the nail salon again. A catch-22 if ever there was one….

9. I want to be home from the hospital by the weekend. Just because. Which means I need to give birth today. Outlook unlikely.

10. I feel like I'm letting people down. My friends who check on me daily, my family, my husband, my kids, my daughter's preschool teacher, my son's bus driver, the other moms at the bus stop. They all seem disappointed to see me still pregnant and I get it. I feel the same way!

Oh, and here's the bonus reason: Wine. And dirty martinis. And beer. And pretty much any other alcoholic beverage I've laid off of for the past nine months. Nothing like pregnancy to make you seriously crave a cocktail. I really thought I'd be imbibing at least a little by now. Hmmm, maybe I should get induced after all?!

So, were any of your babies late? Did you get frustrated? Have any crazy reasons for wanting the kid out? Got any tips for bringing on labor naturally? I'll try anything at this point!