7 Signs You're a MILF (Mom I'd like to Friend)

When you're pregnant you don't think it's going to happen to you -that metamorphosis from hip, happening woman about town (or at least work) to suburban, frumpalump who may or may not cut her own bangs. I know right? Who would ever cut their own bangs besides a fifteen-year-old in the throes of PMS crying to a Selena Gomez video? ME! It's sort of the reverse of caterpillar to butterfly. The butterfly who starts out in Jeans and Jimmy Choo and ends up in sweats and shower shoes with legs so hairy it looks like a caterpillar. Where's the Eric Carle book about that?

I used to fight it! But now I embrace it! I embrace the short cuts I take, the limitations I have, the fact that an exciting night for me is watching X-Factor and eating a bowl of sugar-free ice cream.

What are my options really? Be mad about it? My kids are still young and this is just life as a mom of young ones despite the fact that I myself am no longer young.I catch my fun where I can and realize that this time is fleeting and I need to make the most of it.

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Here's the thing: I need friends I can hang with who totally get it, who get me, are in the same place. I need moms in my life who speak the same language; moms who think a banana clip is a perfectly acceptable antidote to a bad hair day, moms who have played their kid's Justin Bieber CD when their kids weren't in the car -on purpose.So, are you a MILF - a mom I'd like to friend? If so, find me on Facebook, tweet me, email me. Let's find ways to enjoy these years and laugh at those other crazy moms -you know, the ones with LIVES. Here are some other ways you can tell you're part of my tribe.



1. You own a pair of "special occasion" flip flops.
Kind of speaks for itself doesn't it?



2. You can't be 100% sure when you last showered.
I think it was yesterday but I'm not under oath, right?

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3. You've purchased sunscreen with an SPF higher than 50.
Does it go up to 100? 'Cause I'll take some of that.



4. You could never imagine traveling somewhere with your kids that doesn't have a microwave.
What good are Dino nuggets if you ain't got nowhere to cook 'em?



5. You kid pees on the floor and you don't clean it up right away.
Sometimes, when you're potty training twins...well...try not to judge 'till you've been in my shoes.

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6. You've woken up at 7:45 a.m. and thought, "Aah, it feels so good to sleep in!"
Has anyone's husband ever let them sleep in until 10? Really? No one? At this point I don't know if I could sleep past 7 even if I was told to.



7. You suspect anyone who stays up past 11 of taking their kid's Ritalin.
Or doing cocaine or being an alien or just having an amazing life that's much more exciting than yours.


For more on signs that you might be a MILF, visit Babble!

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BlurbBaby on Bored is an impressively self-aware blog chronicling the everyday life of Stefanie Wilder Taylor. Alternately funny and serious, Wilder Taylor has legions of fans following her, offering praise on her good days and support on the not-so-good ones.