Crabmommy: All treat no trick?

Glamour Magazine

As Halloween approaches I find myself once again turning to crabby thoughts on this the sweetest day of the year. I'm all for the mini-Snickers and the decorating of pumpkins. I'm all for the cute little ones going door to door on our pleasant street. I'm all for the camaraderie of strangers and friends as we celebrate all things spooktacular. That said, the holiday still feels a little too sugary-sweet for my liking, and I'm not just talking about the candy.

On a day when being bad is--theoretically--celebrated, I'm a little sad that all our kids are so good. If this year is anything like last year, there won't be any toilet paper in the trees, nor egged cars in my neighborhood. Just truckloads of candy and the same-old same-old warning about razor blade and apples (or, in the modern version, that would be Chinese teflon in the candy corn or whatever). But what about a real hint of evildoing on this the one night of the year when our children are free to dress as evil creatures? For every little witch out there this Friday, I'm going to bet none of them plan to perform any black magic.

Seriously, we all know where the treats are, but what about the tricks? No child I know says "Trick or treat?" with any real sincerity. It's just the obligatory phrase preceding the obligatory candy. But wouldn't it be fun if they really did have to be cunning--if they really had to come up with a trick or two to play upon us? I'm just saying where's the fun in Halloween? It's all too predictable: you hold out your hand, you get the candy. You say "thank you" and then you move on. Bo-ring. (Go trick-or-treating with these unique D.I.Y. totes.)

Think how much more thrilling Halloween would be for kids if they felt free to do something naughty on the one day of the year when being bad might be good. A little harm can be harmless. Hey, it might even be fun. With that in mind I'm letting 4-year-old Crabkid come up with a trick to play on her dad and told my neighbors their kids are free to play tricks on us. (Eek! What am I in for? Eh, probably nothing.)

Crabkid wants to put shaving cream in Dad's sock this Friday and that, above all else, is what she's looking forward to. She's been plotting this out all week long. If all goes well and she fulfills my expectations of her, she'll be TP-ing your tree in her teens. That way, she'll have something to remember and so will you. After all, what are holidays without memories to last a lifetime? [insert evil, hollow laughter]

What do you think? Would you like to see some mischief in your 'hood or do you like your Halloween clean?

Still looking for a great Halloween costume for the little runt? These last-minute costume ideas make it easy for you.

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