Giuliana and Bill Rancic Put Marriage Before Baby. Everyone Freaks Out.

Giuliana and Bill Rancic put their marriage first. (Photo: Getty Images)If you’re looking to avoid criticism as a parent, whatever you do, do not say you put your marriage before your children.

Giuliana Rancic, who shares both a child and reality show with husband Bill, learned this the hard way.  “For us, I find, we put our marriage first and our child second, because the best thing we can do for him is have a strong marriage," Rancic told US Weekly

The stars of Style Network's "Giuliana and Bill," have spent the past few years publicly airing their private life on TV—from their rocky engagement to their struggle to conceive. But Rancic's comment is might be getting more attention than anticipated.  

It turns out putting your marriage “first” is still a controversial thing to say. Giuliana’s quote made headlines at The Daily Mail, Radar Online, HuffPo, and more. At Jezebel, Lindy West wrote, “I’m sure this sounds worse on paper than the way they meant it, right?”

The Rancics haven't clarified, but Stir's mommy blogger offered one explanation. "She saying is that she and Bill are totally devoted to each other, they love each other madly, and they want to take care of each other, which makes it easier and more natural for them to share the responsibility of caring for their baby, whom they also love madly." Not everyone's on board with that interpretation.  

“In marriages where two sensible adults are involved, you understand that at times, the kids certainly do come first," wrote a fairly outraged Huffington Post commenter.

This isn't the first time a "marriage first" decision has come under scrutiny. When writer Ayelet Waldaman, the wife of author Michael Chabon, wrote a piece in 2005 for The New York Times, proclaiming that she was more "in love" with her husband than her children, a media firestorm followed, with condemnations from mommy bloggers across the country and an invitation to the Oprah show in order to "explain herself." 

To the mom of four, it's really simple. "If a good mother is one who loves her child more than anyone else in the world, I am not a good mother," Waldaman wrote.

That's not to say she's an absentee parent. "I spend a good part of every day: bathing them, combing their hair, sitting with them while they do their homework, holding them while they weep their tragic tears," but it's her husband's face that "inspires her."

What's so wrong with that? Nothing, according to David Code, author of To Raise Happy Kids, Put Your Marriage First. "These days, many parents seem to be married to their children instead of their spouses," Code told WebMd. "This creates stressed-out parents who feel disconnected from each other and demanding, entitled kids who act out."

But if you ask a few hundred commenters on the Rancic news, they'll tell you it's a "luxury" to put your husband first, and a mistake. 

“I’m sorry, husbands come and go but your children will always be there,” one Daily Mail pointed out. 

Everyone's got an opinion, but is there really a one-size-fits all when it comes to family priorities? 

 

Related on Shine:

Giuliana Rancic on Fitness, Recovering from Cancer, and Looking Forward to Motherhood Could You Benefit Your Kids by Putting Your Marriage First?
5 Secrets to a Happy Marriage: Revealed by Divorce