jerry portelli/istock.If you found a brand new cashmere-lined brown leather glove outside the bagel shop in my town last week, I have one question for you: What are you gonna do with that? I ask, because I have the other one, and I have no idea what to do with one glove, short of going as Michael Jackson for Halloween. So maybe you have a better idea.
A few hours after I dropped it, probably in the parking lot in front of the bagel shop, I went back to find it.
"Back for more?" one of the shopkeepers asked when I arrived. I told her about the glove, and asked if anyone had turned it in, but I was out of luck. Also, I was out a brand new glove, which I didn't want to buy in the first place, but my mother had talked me into it.
My three-year-old faux suede (read: cheap) gloves were falling apart. Besides, they were no match for last month's sub-zero temperatures, so my mom suggested that I get cashmere-lined gloves before I was to head to Chicago, where it was something like minus 30 degrees that week - and I'm not exaggerating.
I found a pair on sale and ordered them online. Soon though, I discovered that cashmere-lined gloves are also no match for sub-zero temperatures. But, unlike my old gloves, at least they didn't have spaces in the stitching where you could insert coins or pieces of gum.
And then I dropped one in the parking lot at the bagel shop. And then, presumably, somebody picked it up and brought it home. And then I went back to wearing my old gloves and warming pieces of Juicy Fruit in their holes.
So if you have my glove, I wonder why you're hanging onto it. Maybe you don't know what to do with it or where to turn it in. Maybe you handed it over to the folks at the nail salon next to the bagel shop. But really now: Who wears gloves when they get a manicure?
I will check with the nail salon the next time I swing by the area, but you see, I've got more to do than hunt down a glove. And I'm sure that you have more to do than figure out where to return it. That's why it's probably sitting on the front seat of your car, just like the children's hat I found after a soccer game last October that's still in my mini-van. When I tried to find the parent who no doubt was looking for it, I came up empty, and soon, I gave up. Need a hat?
So, I guess I'm saying that I understand where you're coming from. If you're like me, you have so many little things to complete in one day that trying to figure out what to do with some stranger's stray new glove is near the bottom of your to-do list, somewhere below "Pick up dry cleaning" and "Drop kids off at piano lessons," but above "Figure out why the crisper door in the fridge doesn't close all the way" and "Mop."
But, on the bright side, I can now strike "Write blog" off my to-do list, thanks to my missing glove that's riding around in your car. As for getting it back, I think I'll just use my pockets until spring. It's easier.
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