Why I was Unmoved by the "World's Toughest Job" Video

By Sarah Smith, REDBOOK.

Confession: I was unmoved by the "World's Toughest Job" video. You know the one. It's popping up in Facebook feeds faster than a "What character on New Girl are you?" quiz (wait, does that exist? I'd take that), usually accompanied by comments like "Love!" and "So true" and "Crying now."

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Perhaps I did not cry myself because I knew what was coming, thanks in part to who I saw sharing the video. Hint: It was not the people who usually post their "Where am I now?" vacation pictures, but the ones who share their kids' funny observations on life (I love those, btw--not knocking them). But honestly, even if I'd clicked on it blind, wasn't it a bit obvious? Don't we all know the trope that moms have the worst, most thankless job in the world?

I'm so bored by that idea, I can't even tell you.

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One day when my son was tiny, when he was so puzzling to us and we were so very tired, my husband said, "Well, he's still easier than being at work." He continues to think that, even when our now-toddler throws his food on the ground and calls for the dog to come eat it. True, it's because my husband is an emergency room nurse and he never, not once, gets to sit down at work. (Even toddlers will often let you sit on the floor to put their shoes on.) But it's not just that there are harder jobs than watching a kid be cute, be annoying, be exhausting, be himself.

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The main reason I'm over this "Ooh, moms, you are so amazing to do something so hard and thankless" idea is that it feels false. It feels like you're patting me on the head and saying I'm cute. Why is it a man delivering the message in this video? Because then people will take it seriously, of course. Who would believe just another woman saying moms are great? Look, I'm lucky enough to feel appreciated by my family, and I hope my husband (who stays at home with our son most days, so don't even get us started on all this focus on moms) does too. But this? This universal patting-on-the-head, this "your life kind of sucks but you should love it!"... this hollow praise, it's just patronizing.


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