Aries (March 21 - April 19) You get the double whammy today. A delivery is bad enough, but florists are the worst. Not only do they violate your space, you can't eat what they leave on the porch.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20) Slow by nature, you'll find yourself feeling some urgency to pick the right spot. Don't be bipolar; this is no time to shop around.
Cancer (June 22 - July 22) You're somewhat suspicious and tend to bark without provocation, but take it easy today. Put your good memory to use and spare a visitor; you may get a treat.
Leo (July 23 - August 22) You'll have a chance to change the opinion of a new human. They thought cats and dogs got along like, well, cats and dogs, but they'd never seen the likes of you and Ms. Kitty.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22) Avoid problems with fellow dogs and humans alike. The world doesn't need one more combative personality, so focus on your tamer side.
Libra (September 23 - October 22) It's not as bad as you think, certainly not as bad as you've been imagining. A bath is a bath is a bath, and they do get easier with repetition.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21) To avoid conflict with your otherwise loving human, remember that sleep is sacred. If you wake them again in the middle of the night, things could get ugly.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21) Life is not drudgery. Your owner can get a lot done and have fun with it, too, so why should you be left in the laundry room while they clean? The yard is clearly a better choice.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19) Luckily for dogs, you're not required to juggle family and career. In fact, you'll have no trouble going back to work. Like your ancestors before you, your puppies will be strangers to you in the blink of an eye.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18) Your owner has some advanced ideas about love, but they don't understand dog behavior. You can be true blue and still steal a steak off of anyone's plate.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20) You put on plenty of camouflage, but the results are ambiguous at best and downright bewildering at worst. It's time for yet another bath.
Charles McDonald and Nate Tice's latest mock draft has five quarterbacks off the board in the top 13, a big-time weapon for Aaron Rodgers and some steals in the second half of the first round.