Upper East Side New Yorkers Are Tattooing Their Dogs

Dogs getting tattoos? Uh...Dogs getting tattoos? Uh...If you feel bad about your most recent indulgence - say, a $200 splurge on shoes, or your first Groupon order for a housekeeper - take heart, because there will always, always, be people who are on a planet even further away from the Earth.

By Anna Breslaw

The proof? Sentences like this: "Sometimes, my dog and I dress in the same color if we're going to a red carpet event." (I told you.)

The above, spoken by an Upper East Side Manhattan resident (naturally this would go down in the birthplace of Gossip Girl), isn't even the craziest part of this article in the New York Observer, which exposes a new trend in the hoity-toity neighborhood's canine grooming. Specifically, glitter tattoos for dogs. You heard me. Since the heydays of Paris Hilton, little purse dogs have long been a status symbol, and now that we've run out of room on our own bodies (Tramp stamps - check! Vajazzling - check!), getting a bling-tastic rose or heart glued to our pooch's rump is the next crazy-a*s cultural signifier.

The service is provided by Jorge Bendersky, celebrity dog groomer in the area, who says that in the summer, when dogs' fur is kept short, they need a little something extra to "keep it glamorous." Because when they're licking their crotches, humping other dogs, and pooping at the dog run, glamour is obviously their primary concern.

Related: Would You Wear Temporary Tattoos on Your Tatas?

The good news is that the actual process seems harmless and painless, from its description on DNAinfo:

"To 'tattoo' a dog, Bendersky and other groomers typically start off by filling in a stencil with canine-safe glue. Next, they add dog-friendly glitter and, sometimes, pre-packed designs with rhinestones.

These designs, which cost approximately $100, are most often placed on dogs' hips or tailbone, making the placement analogous to a lower back tattoo on a person.

'It's all about the tramp stamp,' Bendersky said. 'Dogs are like humans, and when they accessorize they get attention. A pink dog does not know it's pink, but when people are smiling and taking pictures, it gets attention. So, a dog likes to get tattoos.'

Naturally, the dogs (i.e. the dog's owners) obtain their tattoos along gendered lines, says Bendersky's PR rep. "Female pups tend to prefer a rose, butterfly or heart design, while males prefer a star, anchor or a skull and crossbones." I will admit, if I encountered a human dude with a skull and crossbones tramp stamp, I would LOL oh so heartily.

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