Aries (March 21 - April 19) There may be conflicts in store for you today, but you'll be ready. They may think they can get you steamed by throwing pies in your face. But you'll only laugh, pull out a fork, and enjoy the variety of heavenly flavors. Now, if only someone would toss some ice cream at you.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20) Someone attractive may strike your fancy today, and you'll be smitten. This person will have eyes the color of dark chocolate, hair like that of an angel, and a complexion of silky butter. Dang -- now you're hungry again, and not for what may be waiting for you in the bedroom.
Gemini (May 21 - June 21) You may find yourself the bad guy in a family dispute. You may not be able to appeal through logic, so get to them through their stomachs instead. Invite them for a mediation dinner, and serve your homemade lasagna. That gets 'em every time!
Cancer (June 22 - July 22) Today will be a good one to make plans for the future. They may be inconsequential to others, but of great importance to you. Think deeply about them now, and perhaps even sleep on them. But come morning you'll have to decide between tuna or roast beef for lunch, and that's never easy.
Leo (July 23 - August 22) You may feel underdone today. Introversion and conservative thought will have you less impulsive than usual. This could be a good thing, as it may calm your indulgences. So instead of the four-course meal you'll go for the dieter's special. Wash that down with a diet cola, natch!
Virgo (August 23 - September 22) Tidy up your workspace today. Throw out all of the empty chip bags, Chinese take-out boxes, chocolate wrappers, odd scraps of popcorn, soda cans and nacho containers with cheese still crusted to it. Oh, and green stuff isn't supposed to be on that bagel, so don't save it -- or eat it.
Libra (September 23 - October 22) You'll hear those nagging voices in your head today. One will be all for ordering a large double cheese pepperoni pizza, while the other will scold you while waving a tofu and sprout sandwich in your face. Good luck with that today, but don't make that decision on an empty stomach.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21) Don't tell secrets to anyone today, not even your most trusted friends. One slip of the tongue could have one person telling another and soon the whole town will have your secret recipe for four-alarm buffalo wings.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21) Your caviar dreams may fizzle to peanut butter reality today as you realize you won't be getting a raise. It may be time to look for new restaurant, one with a better menu and where diners are treated with respect. It's either that or get used to a steady diet of peanut butter.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19) Upon doing some research you may uncover some shocking facts. What you discover may shake you to your roots, and you may feel betrayed. You may need professional help to cope with the knowledge that your favorite 'non-fat' yogurt isn't all it's cracked up to be.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18) You may be upstairs planning a menu, while others are downstairs planning something completely different. Knives may be drawn when the two meet halfway until you realize that two good plans may add up to one great one. Then you'll really be cooking!
Pisces (February 19 - March 20) Don't ask questions today; just do it. Just dive in and attack with reckless abandon. Bite into the fruit of life and let the juices run down your chin. When you're through with the fruit go for the cakes, and smear your face with icing. But avoid the pizza and all that greasy pepperoni.
Our final 2024 mock draft projects four quarterbacks in the first five picks, but the Cardinals at No. 4 might represent the key pivot point of the entire board.
