Fast Food Fish Fillet Showdown
You've got your Big Mac fans and your Whopper people and your Dave's Hot 'N Juicy lovers. But what about the rest of us - those who love a salty, fried, fat-saturated good time, but without beef entering the equation? Allow me to speak for the fast food fish fillet lovers out there.
The recent news that Wendy's is surpassing Burger King as the second-highest grossing fast food franchise gave me pause. It took me off guard. I had never taken Wendy's seriously. I have never even been to the establishment. A brilliant idea was sprung: a taste test, in which I eat a fish fillet meal at each of the three franchises during one lunch hour!
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Wendy's Fish Sandwich
The first thing I noticed about this sandwich was the bun; it had a roll-like quality, like it earnestly aspired to emulate its ciabatta cousin. Which is not to say that it had any taste, but it wasn't doughy and weird like a Subway roll, and it was fairly innocuous. What's most distinctive about the taste of this sandwich is that the filet crust, made with panko, has a real crunchy texture with a smoky flavor that recalls a well-baked piece of Gorton's. And I don't say that as pejorative. The tartar sauce is more like a Russian dressing with some scant pickle in it. Not bad. And the fish itself is evident, which is a good start, and although it doesn't taste like much, there's an essence of fish, without being fishy.
Star rating (out of 5): 3.5 | Price: $6.52 (for the meal)
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McDonald's Filet-O-Fish
After Wendy's, I was sorely disappointed. First, the "steamed" bun (why are they so proud of steaming their buns?!) is so ludicrously spongy that I am sure old discarded McDonald's buns are right now being repurposed as sponges in third world countries. As for the fish, well, the fillet is so thin, it's hardly distinguishable from the highly processed crust. It's just a sliver of friedness, with a stronger essence of fish taste than Wendy's that is not exactly rank, but it doesn't make me want to go yum. The tartar sauce is creamier than Wendy's, and more convincing. But more than anything, I'm struck by how spongy and small the whole sandwich is. I'm not sure I'll ever be able to order one of these things again.
Star rating (out of 5): 1.5 | Price: $7.28 (for the meal)
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Burger King BK Big Fish
When I opened up my box, I was sincerely impressed by the presentation. Burger King brings their A-game to the fish fillet market. Just look at that bun! It's huge. It's the Shaquille O'Neil of fish fillets. When I bite into it, I almost gag-it has the same spongy quality of McDonald's, but it's three inches thicker. There's so much bread, even the admittedly bigger fish gets lost in there. And the taste? Well, there's no fish taste at all. Where the other franchises appear to have added Fish Taste Number 436, Burger King seems to have sucked it all out. But the tartar sauce is the worst part of the experience: it's not like any sauce I've ever seen or tasted.
Star rating (out of 5): 2 | Price: $6.41 (for the meal)
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For sure, this was a very unfair and unscientific test. For one thing, the cumulative effect of eating at three fast food joints in a row left my vision blurry and my muscles twitching by the time I made it to Burger King. I was severely compromised, and all I can say is I now have a deep appreciation for the sacrifices Morgan Spurlock made for all of us in Super Size Me.
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