Beat the Hair Battle with Your Kids

Stop pulling my hair!Stop pulling my hair! Ouch! That hurts! No! You aren't doing my hair!

It's just a typical morning in my house. Sigh.

My oldest daughter was born with a full head of beautiful hair. I like to tell people that we've been fighting about it at least that long. She simply despises having her hair brushed and styled. I've had more hair battles with her than I have with my two other daughters combined. What have we done to keep our hair battles from turning into war?

Relax the rules.

I care more about how my daughter's hair looks when she's heading to school or we're running errands than I do when we're just hanging out at home. So I've relaxed the hair rules around the house, and my daughter is responsible for her own hair when we're not going anywhere. Quite frankly, it's also one less thing for me to worry about.

Up or off.

Lice have run rampant around the first and second grade, fueling my desire for my daughter to keep her hair up out of her face and less likely to bring home any little pests. When she refused, I put the ball in her court. She could either have her hair, which she loved, cut into a chin-length bob, or she could stop complaining about getting her hair done in the mornings. By giving her the choice and the power in this instance, we were able to cut back the amount of fighting we had about getting her hair done.


Tangles cause the majority of our hair battles. "You're pulling too hard!" "Ouch! That hurts Mommy!" Over the years we've learned that my daughter needs a combination of regular conditioner and spray/leave-in conditioner. The fewer tangles we have, the fewer fights we have.

As my daughter has gotten older, I've also asked her to brush her hair first. She gets rid of some tangles (though not all) before I have to start the bulk of the work. She's learning the skills she'll need to one day take care of her hair without my help. I also hope she's learning that tangles happen-I don't enjoy tugging at her hair!

Wait it out.

My daughter is almost nine and I'm proud to report that the other day she brushed and styled her hair all by herself. It looked pretty cute, too! I wish there was some magic cure for the hair battles we fought over the years. But in our case, the simple passing of time was the best solution.

Content by Kelly Herdrich.