Is It Weird If a Woman Grooms Her Guy?
By Marianne Beach, GalTime.com
Your guy's got it all--the looks, the success, the charming personality--and those three nose hairs sticking out that drive you crazy every time you look at him. And don't even get us started on that bushy unibrow. In a world of metrosexuals and manscaping--should we, as women, attempt to groom our guys? Or just accept them just as they are--au natural?
We asked Manhattan Life and Relationship Coach Julie Melillo of YourDreamLifeCoach.com. She's worked with CEOs, entrepreneurs, actors and financial professionals. Her first piece of advice--don't get too critical.
"It's important, in a relationship, to not criticize your partner," she insists. "Whether the issue is extra pounds or personal grooming, making your honey feel horrible is never the answer."
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Instead, she suggests, if it's really bugging you, try turning the negative into something positive--like a fun spa day for the two of you.
"A surprising number of straight men do enjoy being pampered--they work hard and deserve it!" Melillo says. "I know guys who have jokingly gone with their girlfriends for manicures, but ended up secretly liking it. Whether it's getting a clear-polish manicure, a hair cut, or even waxing, take your man to the salon and suggest he go crazy on the services, just for fun. He might find he likes how he looks when he's well-groomed."
Of, if he's the type to shy away from strangers bearing hot wax, offer up your own spa services at home instead.
"If there is a hair issue, let's say a sprawling unibrow taking up too much face real-estate, tell him you read a trick for taming it in a magazine, and you'd like to try it," Melillo suggests. "Keep the mood light, and make sure he knows it's no big deal. Perhaps even mention your own beauty-care regiments so he knows he's not alone."
But be careful when joking around not to go too far.
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"Some guys are okay with joking about these topics, and some aren't," Melillo says. "Knowing your man, you'll know if it's okay to make a joke of the random three back hairs that have invaded his torso (or not)."
And ladies--let's not get too picky here. Remember, hair does not define the man.
"Do you love him less if he's growing a strange mustache?" asks Melillo. "Are there some things you can live with? These are questions only you can answer. If you really feel he's embarrassing himself, or even reducing his odds of snagging a great job, then do step in. But only in the most tactful and understanding way. Challenge yourself to accept some of the superficial things that are driving you crazy, especially the things that really aren't a huge problem, but are only mildly annoying."
Bottom line? Do unto your man, as you would have him do unto you. "You never want your man to tell you 'Baby, you're looking fat. And that dress is ugly.' So don't speak to your man this way, either!" says Melillo. "Keep it positive and make suggestions. Make sure you don't attack him, insult him, or hurt his feelings!"
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