Mom Confession: I'm a Terrible Wife
Like many parents, this mom wasn't prepared for how all-consuming motherhood would be. She's only got enough energy for one man in her life -- her son. Read her mom confession:
I'm a very good mother. But I'm a terrible wife.
It wasn't always like this. My husband and I were together for 12 years before our son was born. That's a pretty long love affair by any standard. And it was a love affair. But then this thing happened. We had a baby. And overnight it went from all about us to all about him-him being our son.
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My husband says the problem is mine. There simply isn't enough of me to go around. But when I'm being completely honest with myself, I admit that it goes deeper than that. How deep, exactly, I don't know. Balance is definitely a piece of it. But there are other things, too. Like the fact that I no longer have the energy to connect with my husband on the level that we connected before we became parents.
I freely admit that I put my son first. The last piece of cake? No contest. Dinner and a movie? OK, as long as it's pizza and Over the Hedge. If meeting my husband and his colleagues for a drink means leaving my son with a random babysitter, you can bet I'm opting out of cocktails.
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I wonder sometimes about those other moms. The ones who talk about romantic evenings with their husbands and weekends away from the kids. And then I think, I did that for 12 years. Before our son was born.
Would the outcome have been any different if I had become a mother soon after becoming a wife? Would I have had a better sense of balance? Would I be doing a better job caring for my man? Does my husband really care? Well, he does care, of course, but in spite of his frequently asking "What about me?" I sense that he is somehow OK with all of this. The problem is, I don't know if I am.
Can you relate? Is it possible to be a good mother AND a good wife?
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