Reality television jumps the bear: "Kate Plus 8" goes camping in "Sarah Palin's Alaska"

Kate Gosselin gets tight with the Palins before setting off into the Alaskan wilds.
Kate Gosselin gets tight with the Palins before setting off into the Alaskan wilds.

In the downward spiral that has taken reality television audiences from semi-plausible storylines to "what the hell am I filling my head with" shows, news like this shouldn't be surprising. And yet here we are, mouths agape, wondering which TLC executive was raised to demigod status after producing this piece of television, er...history.

That's right, Kate and her eight have apparently made a trip to Alaska, where they hung out with "Mama Grizzly," her hubs, and her cubs. Needless to say, what happens in Alaska does not stay in Alaska. According to the TLC press release: "To prepare for a camping trip with the kids, Sarah takes Kate to a bear safety class for rifle practice. Then Kate and the kids experience the wilderness braving the challenges of camping in Alaska." According to the Huffington Post, "Kate proves to be a bigger pill than a horse tranquilizer," complaining about the cold, worrying about the bears, and generally freaking out until, just a few hours in, she pulls the plug on the whole experience.

"I don't see a table, I don't see utensils, I don't see hand-cleansing materials," Kate says, after spending most of the time huddled under a tarp. "This is not ideal conditions. I am freezing to the bone, I have 19 layers on, my hands are frigid. I held it together as long as I could and I'm done now!"

So what does Palin make of her fellow reality television star bailing on the night's activity?

"Well, I thought we were gonna go camping with the Gosselins," Palin says, full of aw-shucks-let's-turn-this-into-an-opportunity-to-further-my-brand. "Turned out, we didn't. We had lunch with them on a sand bar."

Honestly, I can believe Sarah P. can hack the wilderness in ways Kate G. never will. I even believe both of these ladies have tried to be good parents, in their way. What I don't believe? That this entitles them to showing up on my television over and over again, in stranger and stranger incarnations. Honestly, at this point, I just don't ever need to see either them again--not on "Kate Plus 8", not on "Sarah Palin's Alaska", not on "The View," not on "Dancing with the Stars," and not in the 2012 election.

Maybe you feel differently. Maybe you can't get enough of multiples and moose sitings. If that's the case, the whole bizarre episode will make its way to your television set on Sunday December 12 at 9/8c, on TLC. Just don't call me to talk about it afterward.