The 4 Things You Must Know About Your Man's Money Habits
We already endure enough stress when it comes to our jobs and bank accounts, but when finances start to pull our relationships under too, we truly spite this economy. So when we heard about new book The Secret Currency of Love, a collection of essays about how money affects relationships, we knew we had to chat with the book's editor, Hilary Black. Here are a few things she's learned.
Q: How is the troubled economy affecting relationships?
A: When people are in fear of losing their jobs or money, it can cause an enormous amount of tension and fighting. Spending habits - like something as simple as going to a restaurant - can turn in to an argument and even tear people apart.
Q: So how can couples "recession-proof" their bond?
A: Use this as a time to find out how he deals with money. There are four questions you should ask him: How much does [he tend to keep] in the bank? Does he save for rainy days or does he splurge? Is he responsible with money? What about paying bills? And be prepared to answer these questions yourself.
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Q: When is the right time to bring up these questions?
A: Definitely talk about it before getting married or taking a big step, like moving in together.
Q: Is there anything you should find out earlier on in the dating process?
A: Credit card debt is a legitimate thing to ask about. To go blindly into a serious relationship is to risk destroying your own credit. Don't bring it up on the first or second or third date, but sometime soon after that.
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Q: What advice do you have for women who make more than their boyfriends?
A: Just be sensitive to him and his alpha male side, and let him pick up the tab sometimes. It will make a man feel small if you are always paying for things.
Q: And what about women who make less?
A: Don't expect him to pay for everything.
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Q: Do you think men should pay on the first date?
A: Yes
Q: Can you change a cheap guy?
A: People born stingy stay stingy.
Q: Is it okay to lend your guy money?
A: If you love him, yes.
Q: Joint bank accounts?
A: One joint, one separate
Q: When should you open an account together?
A: Once engaged or living together
Has money put a strain on your relationship? How do you work together as a couple to overcome financial challenges?
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Reprinted with permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.
