Why Women Need to Stop Feeling

By Elisa Doucette

Women need to stop being their own worst enemy.Women need to stop being their own worst enemy.Ladies - the time has come in this feminist march on advancement for us to jump on our rocket ships and ride.

I received an email last week from a young woman who was looking to break out of her corporate gig and pursue a career in freelance writing. She was looking for advice and resources to begin the process.

In the email, she referenced four times the fact that she didn't feel like she was qualified/talented/strong/ambitious enough for such a jump.

It took everything in me to not email her back with the response "If you feel that way then you need to work a heck of a lot more on yourself before you can base your entire livelihood on you. You will be all that you've got."

This is possibly one of my greatest frustrations when talking to women about their perceived limitations and inability to rise to the top of their career and life's ambitions:

Women don't go for what they want because they don't feel like they can do it.

Don't get me wrong. The glass ceiling is there and it is not going anywhere anytime soon, according to a December 2011 study by the UC Davis Graduate School of Management.

That is frustrating.

Women are perceived to be the kinder, gentler, and more emotional of the sexes - with widespread debate on whether this is biological or sociological. I'm not advocating that women should become cold icy heartless Tiger Ladies who deny their desires and emotions. For many women their empathy and compassion are some of their greatest strengths and attributes.

But I implore you to stop feeling like you can't do something and letting that stop you.

We have accomplished women who are afraid to put their hand up for journalistic op-ed assignments. Successful businesswoman shy to throw down and take their seat at the table. Single women who are afraid to march into a restaurant and have a delicious solitary gourmet meal.

The time is on us. We're long removed from being our parent and spouse's property. We exercise our right to vote and are a widely sought demographic in most elections. Marketing and advertising companies know that women control 85% of all purchasing decisions. We are no longer relegated to secretarial pools and one-roomed school houses. The glass ceiling is still there, but that doesn't mean that we can't take off our stiletto and shatter the heck out of it. After all - it is just made of glass.

Eleanor Roosevelt famously said, before women were even sitting on boards or running corporations, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

In other words, don't give anyone else the power that should lie within yourself.

Stop feeling that you can't or shouldn't and convincing yourself that these are legitimate reasons for why you don't.

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