The communal table trend: What's the etiquette?
Bumping into someone you know at a restaurant can be both wonderful and awkward, but after years of unanticipated restaurant run-ins, we've developed socially acceptable norms for coping. There are the standards like, "Been here before?" and the overly enthusiastic to compensate for being curt, "So good to see ya! Let's talk soon!" route. We were getting the hang of it, but now, thanks to the communal table trend, we've got a bigger fish to fry.
What do you do when you're seated right next to your ex, for example? Finding the happy medium between ignoring them and ditching your dining companion can be challenging for even Emily Post herself.
Just the other night I was eating at Gjelina restaurant, a delicious new hot spot in Venice, California and was seated at a communal table across from my spinning instructor. I wasn't sure if she recognized me. She didn't say hi and her fedora hat made it difficult to catch eye contact for long enough to shoot a hello her way. I could have handled it better than the avoidance route, but I'm just now learning the ways to deal with this new trend. So far I'm leaning on these 5 tips:
1. Always say hello and make eye contact (basically exactly what I didn't do the other night). You're not invisible and just because it's the lighting is dim or you've only met a few times, they still recognize you.
2. Never let em' see you sweat. Even if you're not slap happy chowing next to your contentious co-worker, you don't need to bring out the frowns. Smile and chat briefly but try not to show your frustration.
3. Go with the flow. There's no need to be so stringent about your plan. Finding yourself in an unexpected situation can be awesome. Keeps you on your toes so try to enjoy it.
3. Let them lead. If you're not sure how much to sh*t to shoot, take their cue. If however, chatty Cathy is talking your drum off, smile, chat for a few minutes and sweetly let her know that you would love to catch up but haven't seen your dining companion in a while.
4. Try to connect a few times during the meal but keep it simple. There's nothing worse than eating with a friend who spends the entire meal talking to someone else so keep talky talk to a relative minimum. If however, you and your dining companion are excited about the bump-in and can mutually switch gears, go for the gold. Just remember to be aware if one member of the crew isn't so stoked on the new party.
5. Always say goodbye.
How do you feel about the new communal table trend? What's your advice for dealing with a "surprise" dinner guest?
Related links:
Double standards every woman should know
Should restaurants stick to one shtick?
